I love Sundays.

I just realised something, I will never have to work on a Sunday ever again. Furthermore, I am promising myself that I will never work at a job on a Sunday for the rest of my life, its exciting !

I'm doing laundry, washing regular clothes and getting my dress shirts pressed for tommorrow. I love the simple pleasures of life so much. I just make myself some coffee an hour ago and have been watching a 'What Not to Wear' marathon on TLC.

I had an awesome weekend, and I'm getting my first paycheque on Friday from the bank ! They have an online system, so I can see what my paycheque will be beforehand, which I must say is rather useful. It's the largest paycheque I have ever gotten, and it is exciting. I'm really happy right now, even though there is no significant other in my life right now, I feel fine about it. I do not need someone else to make me fabulous ! My job is great, and it has career posibilities, school starts soon, and I'm excited for it.

I'm starting to feel what I can only describe as 'comfortable in my own skin'. It feels great. It helps that I probably found the most perfect place in the whole world for me to move into when I decide to move out.

One of my co-trainees at the Main Branch in Victoria lives just across the water in a nice part of Esquimalt, in a house built in the 1920's. It's gorgeously bohemian. There is a huge egg painted on one wall of the gigantic kitchen and the firplace is a huge, with brightly painted walls. It has all original hardwood floors and is on a large lot. It also technically has three bedrooms, but right now its her and her friend living there. The third bedroom (hopefully mine in the future) is actually a redone part of the attic, it overlooks the street through these funky old shuttered windows, and has a slanted ceiling, which I love. You get to the room via this narrow, steep staircase, but that is the only downside. The room is quite small, but the closet is HUGE, which is good for me. I love the livingroom too, which they said I could add me desk to, and make part of it into a study for me.

Now, for the best part. The house is owned by her parents, and they do not have a mortgage on it, so they pay rediculously cheap rent, $800 total for the entire place. If I moved in, they would charge me $200, and each pay $300 themselves, because I'm getting the smallest room, and because it's in the attic. I cannot believe how cheap that is. Its not uncommon to pay $600+ for a semi-decent bachelor studio appartment here, and this is a room in a huge funky old house with hardwood floors that is a 10 minute bus ride from downtown. They are also not 'looking' for a roomate, so the room is pretty much mine whenever I decide to move out, since I have no competition for it.

I think I know where I am going to move into come January.

It's a rainy Sunday, the best kind, and I am thoroughly enjoying it.

Today's Wisdom

When life gives you lemons,
bust out the salt and tequila !

You see these shackles baby ? I'm your slave...

So, it's official. I like Justin Timberlakes' new song "SexyBack".

It's honestly the first song of his that I have liked, and it makes me respect him. I mean, look how much he has changed ! When your listening to it, its hard to imagine that he was part of N Sync.

The song is so original, with a good beat, and hot lyrics, it just really impresses me. It's hard to find an artist out there that is willing to rethink they're styles, adventure into new areas and reinvent themselves. That is what separates any artist from a classic. Classics have adapted themselves to the trends, sometimes setting them, and are always original and never afraid to reinvent themselves when they wish.

That, coincidently, is also what I so respect about Madonna. She has existed for three decades, and in each one she was a hit, with original music and a creative style. She not only adapted, but set trends. It says a lot about the true talent that someone can do that.

If Justin can keep it up, I can see myself remaining a fan.

And for those of you who have not heard SexyBack, go download it ...
*cough* I mean, buy it legally !!

RE-re-rethinking.

Ok, so maybe I think too much.

I was extremely high and drunk last night. It was good because sometimes you think of the most simple, yet probable, answers to questions. It took me only 2 minutes of thinking to realise that maybe I have been too harsh on Nathan. I mean, he just started a new job, which deals with some pretty sketchy people. He is getting up early almost every morning, working in a pretty hot office, and then his schedule means we almost never have time off together at the same time. So, I mean, its kinda understandable that he is just having a hard time wanting to actually go out when he has the time to sleep.

Then he called me at 11:30p last night, and put more fuel on the fire. Sonya, Deyth, and I were at a pizza place after Luminara, and before clubbing. He calls to say goodnight, and says he is just walking home. I ask him where he was waling from. He went out to the gay bar with his 'friend' for about an hour. Didn't really bother to tell me he was out, so you know, we could actually hang out or anything. I said he should stop by the pizza place, cause its along he walk home. He was already past it. It was rather coincidental that he forgot to call me until he was already home, and there was no chance of us seeing one another because he had to go to bed for work the next morning. I mean, if that isn't a sign that he doesn't want to see me, then what is ??

I'm fairly certain I hung up on him as he was saying goodnight to me. I mean, I really don't want to listen to any more of your shit, so why should I ? He can call and talk when he decides to be upfront, truthful, and honest with both himself and I.

Now, I am REALLY happy and impressed with myself. Because, right after I hung up on him, I went out and had a really great time with some old friends and never thought once about it ! I enjoyed myself and last night, and no one is going to ruin that !

Fuck.

I am such a cauldron of emotions right now, It's insane.

I got my hair done today, and it looks great now after we coloured it three times. My scalp is shot to hell though. It hurts a lot, and apparently it may scab, but no pain, no gain !

I'm mad about Nathan, surprise. I'm not mad at him, but at myself. I'm just so confused right now. I called him today and asked if he wanted to go out tonight to Luminara with some friends. He told me that he had a guy friend over from Vancouver, and that they didn't know what they are doing, but that he didn't think we should all hang out. I'm pretty sure he's seeing someone else and that he isn't interested in me anymore. Which is fine, just fucking tell me that straight up. I'm so sick of all this shit. There are a couple guys that I'm kinda wanting to date right now that are either moving here soon, or are here now. I'm totally going on a date with one of them tommorrow, and Nathan can call me when he wants to finally talk to me.

I'm going to go out tonight to Luminara and having fun with friends. Luminara is this outdoor lantern festival in Beacon Hill Park at night. Its really warm here right now, so it will be the perfect night for it !

At Work

I'm at work right now, and I'm in a conference call doing training. It is amazingly boring right now. One of the girls has this technical issue so we all have to wait and do nothing while the co-ordinator tries to fix the problem. What ever happened to the days of actual in-class meetings and facilitations for learning !? I mean, we are all a classroom, but half of us are on the mainland, and half of us are on the island. It's kinda cool and creepy that I am training with people that I have never met before and may never meet again.

This is also a new training program that I am doing, so it may just be that this program is new and therefore they need to work out the bugs, and such. It's kinda exciting how cool the funky tools we get to use are, but every once in a while I wish I could actually just use a whiteboard and pen.

Feist and Erika !

Feist actually came to little Victoria ! I went with a friend of mine (Deylth), and we were amazed. She is actually better live than any of her recordings. She plays with the songs and sang them a little different each time. I love her, she just has this bohemian air about her. All of Centenial Square, where she performed, reeked of weed, haha.



After the concert, some friends and I all went to Canoe Club. Along the way, Deyth and I decided we wanted some weed. She decides to then go up to every native or skater person she sees along the way and ask them for weed. This is apparently a very good tactic, because the third person she asked sold us some ! The best part was how she approached them. She would literally say 'excuse me sir, but I was wondering if you happen to have any marijuana we could purchase'. I was laughing so hard !

Anyways, so we then realised that we need rolling papers, so also along our walk, we notice some guys smoking on a balcony along the street. She stops, and in her most flirtatious way, asks them for some. They actually gave us some, but only after some intense flirting on her part. I am so jealous of how women can get whatever they want that way. grr.


Anyways, so we drank at Canoe Club, went to the side and smoked it, and just hung out until about midnight. At this point the two girls decided they really want to go to the gay bar. So, despite my intense disagreement, they dragged me to the gay bar. It's such a sleeze hole. Anyways, so we went there, and guess who I met !?

My trainer from the Bank !! He was out with his boyfriend, it was awesome, we all hung out for a bit. I tried to convince Nathan to come out with us, but he refused, cause he had to work saturday morning at like 8am. Then, later, his roomate comes in and tells me how Nathan stayed up till 1am with him drinking tequila anyways. I was very mad.

Things are better now, but I think that something is up with Nathan. He just seems really tired, and yesterday he wouldn't let me come over for 30 minutes because he had 'plans'. I just thought it was weird, cause he was at home. I mean, what plans did he have ?! argh, whatever.

I'm talking to my friend Erika who has been living just outside Amsterdam as an Au Pair nanny for the past year. She is coming back in a month, and I am SO exicted. She's telling me about how she orders a joint with her coffee in the morning at this coffeeshop run by two old ladies on the way to school to learn dutch. I miss Erika SO MUCH ! She was my wild evil side during my first year, then she went and left me ! So tragic...

But she's coming baaacck soon ! Muwahaha. Here are some pic of her in the Netherlands :

I Heart Club Monaco

My pants from Club Monaco, one of my favourite stores ever, arrived in the mail today. There are two pair, both are a lovely thin, silky wool. One pair is black with an off-white pinstripe, the other is a subtle grey pattern. They are hot.

In case you don't know, the story behind me getting pants Fedex-ed to me starts last Sunday. I was shopping downtown for all the essential clothing requirements of my first week, to ensure I look as hot as possible at work. I bought a pair of Aldo shoes, with the help of Nathan, for 50% off (love employee discount). A gorgeous Matinique thin black silk tie, blue pinstripe shirt, and a pair of fabulous dark cream Club Monaco dress pants. While I was there, I fell in love with the two pairs of thin wool pants described above. They were on sale to boot, for $49 (instead of the original $129). Best sale ever ! They were out of my waist size (31), and the other ones simply would not work. The manager was fabulous and actually called around for almost an hour to find a store in western Canada that had the two pairs I wanted. He eventually found a store in Edmonton, of all places, that had them. For a small charge of $6 a pant, they were Fedex-ed to my house, and charged directly onto my Visa card.

I was so impressed that the manager recognised that I spend a lot of money (easily thousands a year) and time in that store, and went the extra mile for me. Anyone out there who does not frequently go to Club Monaco should ! I will definately be recommending them as much as I can.

They are so wonderful and fabulous, and I got two for less than the original price of one pair, I cannot wait to wear them to RBC tommorrow. Speaking of which, the bank training is going wonderfully. I am treated so well there, its amazing. It's completely overwhelming, and I am simply amazed by how much these people need to know. I cannot wait until tommorrow though. Despite how hard it all is, and how overwhelmed I feel, I am excited to go to work everyday, and that is priceless.

Lots to tell

Ok, so I've have had the best week in a long time.

Drama occured on Sunday night. It was good, bad, ugly and beautiful. Long story short, Dan disappeared, I ran around looking like a fool for him, found him doing lines of coke in a sketchy alleyway with his roomie. I was his ride home though, so even though I was mad I stayed and danced with them back at the club we were at. Even though everyone I knew was at another place (except Charlie). While I'm dancing right near him, he goes and starts grinding with this guy, then they start making out. I flipped. I mean, we were not even really dating, but I was out with him, and I was overlooking his apparent drug issues to give him a ride home, and he goes off with this slut !

I just walked away, like Kelly Clarkson says. I went to Prism Lounge, where the people I knew were, and just vented. I was a very angry, upset, sad, drunk. (apparently after I left Dan, Charlie punched him :D )

At Prism, I met Nathan. He's roomates with a guy named Lanny who I hung out with a bit, but didn't really turn out to be my type. They have a big appartment of gay love, and drama. Jeremy, the source of the drama, just moved out and took all the furniture with him, but thats another story. Anyways, so yeah, I've always had a bit of a crush on Nathan, he is SO hot. We started talking about how gay men in this town suck and how much they are players. At this point I have almost all my gay male friends telling me how Dan has a reputation, and how sketchy he is, even Nathan told me he was warned about him. Sigh, could have used the gossip earlier, but alas, it was a learning.

Anyways, so I went to Nathan's that night. Me and four guys all hung out in a bed, smoking pot, and ranting about life. I cuddled and made out with Nathan until the sun actually started coming up.

In the five days since Sunday, I've slept over every one except Tuesday. I don't know what to think, but I've never been like this with a guy before, EVER. We have not only clicked right away, but we've been really honest with one another. He is so sweet. I am almost dumbfounded by how this is progressing. I especially love how I'm just letting it go however it wants, let it flow and see where we go.

Yeah, thats been my week in a nutshell. There has been some work related stuff, but that is also another post. ;)

Stella in the shower.

... is the best thing EVER after work. Today at work sucked big time. I'm not talking about it.

I've gone out a LOT with Dan now. He rocks. I'm kinda drunk a little right now. Oh yea, and its pride. i'm too lazt to type more about whats been going on, but I am going to tommorrow, so yeah.

thats all ! I'm going out tonight, WEEee 1